Ethan, a professional man, was angry and calling his wife all sorts of names when he came to us. “She’s having an affair with a guy she met at a roller skating rink. I just found out.” He became very tearful. “What can I do? I love her. I want to save my marriage.” He swallowed hard. “I don’t understand. I try to be a perfect husband.”
But he hadn’t been a good husband – not really. At least, not in her opinion. When I had the chance to talk with her she told me, “I put up with him as long as I could. I needed someone who would love me the way I needed.” Although they blamed each other, both were at fault; but in her disillusionment she started looking elsewhere outside her marriage and “fell in love” with the first guy who gave her attention. She began a love affair with him. The affair did not endure and soon she was That didn’t last, so she was off looking for another guy. Meanwhile their children floundered.
People have more reasons to justify their forays into adultery than a centipede has legs. Fortunately, physical adultery still shocks people – and especially if the faithless are famous, like Tiger Woods, or Jesse James, the husband of Sandra Bullock. At this time, it doesn’t look like either one is going to be able to save his marriage. Having sex outside your committed relationship can destroy your family, friends and spouse.
Having an affair emotionally or mentally can be adultery as well. A person can have sex mentally with someone else and no one is the wiser unless the porn or email correspondence that reveals their indulgence is discovered. Emotional disloyalty, by choosing someone other than your spouse as your closest confidant and friend, when there are romantic undertones, chips away at married closeness and can escalate into physical betrayal.
Mail this post



